This past Monday morning, herds of students were absolutely bewildered when they opened up their Student Report Dashboards to discover midterm grades were not yet posted. Students reported that the grades were not officially available until nearly an entire hour later than they were supposed to.
“I was playing Candy Crush on my iPad in my history class,” said Millie Graham ‘17, “When I saw an email notification saying that the midterm grades were posted. I then went to PAnet only to find that they weren’t even there. I was really nervous and confused at that point. I didn’t know what to do.”
According to Graham, this email came in at 9:33am. A second email was sent at 10:05am to explain that there were technical difficulties.
“Those 35 minutes were probably the most stressful 35 minutes of my life,” remarked Lisa Carr ‘18. “In my four years at Andover, no grade scared me like this lack of information did,” added her older brother Rusty ‘16.
The second email attempted to reassure the already panicking students by saying that their “friends in technology” were working on the issue. The Gorilla planned to interview these “friends in technology” before realizing that nobody actually knows who these alleged people are.
After countless students tried and failed to access their grades, freshman Brandon Cattell tried clicking on the “History” tab. His grades suddenly appeared.
Everybody else tried the same thing, and the problem was promptly resolved.
We’re not even sure why we’re reporting on it.
By Ethan Brown ’17